Ringing in the New Year with a hammer and nail

basement project

Last night I succumbed to the plague that has been circling our family and crawled into bed at eight pm.

Before that, I had made this amazing soup from my dear friend Amanda Gibson in Utila, and there was silliness and a handful of profound thoughts around the table as we attempted resolutions. 

(Max, age 8: I will not burp in my brother's face at the table, like THIIIIIIIISSSSSSSRAWWWPPP.)

(Piper, age 5: I will learn to read meaningful things.)

(Hayden, age 11: I will live a more eco-friendly life wherever I am.)

I fell asleep to the sounds of the new year ringing in with hammer and nail as J and the boys continued the basement framing of Hayden's future bedroom. It feels appropriate, like a continuation of our Utila commitment to circle the wagons, to shift the focus to home and family. That we end this year with a beginning. 

"What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from."

-T.S. Eliot

I dreamed up two jars in my sleep--one where we could put ideas for fun things to do, and a (consequence) job jar. As much as I love alliteration, I renamed the second one the Teamwork jar, since we have been talking a lot as we traveled about our family as a team, and how we all need to work together for things to happen.

We'll see how excited the kids get about this. I can already detect some scoffing. Today, some of Hayden's pals dropped by while I was mopping where I had slopped some water moving the Christmas tree out and the orange tree back into a sunnier spot of distinction. I was mopping away, jamming out to some Usher and Hayden sort of cornered me and whispered fiercely, "Mom, why do you have to be so, so CLEAN all the time?"

In my defense, I haven't mopped in a month.

While I booting out Christmas and other vestiges of 2012, cleaning and scheming, I did some reflecting.

2012 has been a good year. Not the best. Not the worst. Good. If I were writing its report card, I'd give it a B. On the right track! Solid effort; room for improvement...

I also made a handful of resolutions, but the one I feel is most important is my commitment to write words every day. I first made this the year I turned seventeen. I was headed off to college, and it was the only year I fully kept this resolution. Freshman year was not an easy transition for me. I wasn't equipt to live away from home but I was more than ready to leave. I've never re-read the journal I kept that year; it would probably make me pretty sad. But I did it. I wrote every night and most nights in the following year. I even looked forward to it. Some nights it was the only the words, "sad. lonely. tired now, more later." 

In the years since then, things have gotten much, much better. I have needed that nightly paper and ink friend less, especially as writing also became my day job. I have continued to keep journals throughout my adult life, relying on it more at some times than others. J says he worries when he notices I am scribbling a lot.

But this year, it will be more of an experiment. A snapshot in stuttershot frames; a 365 project. Words that simply capture this time. As I lounged on the couch with my eleven-year-old this afternoon we were talking about how time in Utila had a different quality, and I realized I could not remember exactly what I had done on my birthday, only three months ago. I panicked. I don't want to forget this, these days, this lucky life. 

Journal writing is about recording moments in the moment, in their vivid reality, capturing them before hindsight has had a chance to tinge memory with color or sepia. It is about the raw format. The bare bones. I want to be able to remember the structure of this year, the frame, when it is exposed. So that I can look back and remember when it is done. 

Because here is the truth: I have high hopes for 2013. It will answer a lot of questions for me. Just like the basement, I have plans to lay flooring and hang figurative drywall, to dress it up with paint and decorate this year. Unlucky number be damned, I want to record it all. Highs and lows, brief memories and witticisms. Snapshots and watercolors. I promise only to subject readers to the highlights.

I'd love to hear what things you are committing to this year. Let's make it memorable! 

The Ides of March

Sixteen years ago today, my oldest niece Freya was born on the Ides of March, which means soon she will getting her learner's permit and taking to the roads. Happy Birthday Freya--we love you!

Freya at the wheel, 1998

The phone call I got announcing her arrival sixteen years ago makes it easy for me to remember that the same night, J and I had our first date, by which I mean to say, engaged in some drunken dance floor moves at Rumheads Nightclub. I remember Coolio's "1-2-3-4" was played more than once.

Way back when

I'm not sure which is scarier--to think of my niece all grown up at the wheel, or that J and I made a connection that set the course of our future in the bar underneath the World Gym on the Caribbean island of Grand Cayman when we both barely old enough to drink in the United States. Sixteen years ago!

What a long strange trip it has been. In my essay, A Wedding Planner Hangs Up Her Headset, I wrote about the practical applications of our relationship, what love has come to mean to me as an adult and what I wish new brides could know from a vantage point a little farther down the road.

In some ways, we were musing in the shower this morning, it seems like we have always been together, and in others, like sixteen years have flown by. How did we get this far? I made a list of a few things that have made this relationship, which is also a deep friendship, feel easy.

1) we both consider ourselves equally lucky to have each other--by this I mean to say, there is no quiet one-upmanship. Which is not to say that I don't think how damn lucky he is when I tote the garbage and recycling cans back and forth to the curb twice a week, a stereotypically male job. But I also acknowledge how fortunate I am to have a guy who can fix almost anything, who gets up in the frozen pre-dawn stillness on Saturday mornings all winter long to coach the boys' hockey teams, who never lets a day go by without telling me I am loved and desired. 

27 May 2000

2) we take turns holding each other up. And we take turns falling apart. You can let life's knocks break you, or shape you. 

(You can read more about this in the essay about the birth of our son Hayden and our baptism by fire into parenthood)

3) we adopt a teamwork approach. This applies to everything from parenting to yard maintenance to hockey weekends to shaving the dog, which you may see more of in a photo essay called "Shearing Season" in an upcoming dog blog. 

2005 4) he makes me laugh Usually by saying all those things I think but might not say. He tries to whisper them, but he's not a very good whisperer. It runs in the family. Did I mention he also makes both the best coffee and mojitos I have ever tasted?

5) we try to shower and/or have coffee together daily to catch-up. This has been important in keeping us connected during the busier stages of our lives. Sometimes I drive him nuts by bringing notebooks and day planners and agendas to these get togethers. Well, not in the shower. 

 6) we have a commitment to being each other's port in the storm. We make our home a place where people build each other up and expect this of the kids as well. 

7) we travel separately. This doesn't mean I am turning down opportunities for us to go away as a couple in favor of spa weekends with the girls. (Although, wait, that sounds really great right now.) But with three little kids and an enormous, slobbery dog, there are few people willing to take on our brood for extended periods of time. This means that when we need to recharge, we drop each other off at the airport and look forward to hearing via Skype about how it was kiteboarding in the Bahamas or visiting with friends and family in the Caribbean or the Rockies, and checking in on the chaos that ensues when one of us is single parenting at the Hoffstead.

8) he is willing to be married to a writer. This comes up all the time when I am a guest author at book clubs--how does your husband handle your writing? Or let's be honest, people want to know: how does he feel about the character of Dan in CHOSEN? Truth of fiction: Is J the inspiration for the character Dan?

The writer and blogger extraordinaire Julianna Baggott has a standard question in her writerly half-dozen interview about advice for those seeking a long-term relationship with a writer. The answers are painfully, honestly hilarious. Actually, pretty much all of her stuff is great. You should check it out.

For the long answer, you have to invite me to your book club. But the short answer is that J handles it beautifully and he lets me post sappy blogs about how much I adore him (sixteen years later!) on the internet. I also include photos of him doing awesome, sporty things, where he looks really hot. 

9) we have similar passions. Wanderlust, the ocean, family, sports, reading, words and nameplay, and most importantly, a dedication to the nurturing of all things Hoffspring--be they pink or furry or scaled or feathered. See, I said feathered. Don't get me wrong. Things aren't perfect. I'm still working on him about the chickens. 

J and the kids at Barkers Beach, 2012

So there you have them, my off-the-cuff Nine Commandments for 16 Years of Happiness. But I am sure there are more and from those far more seasoned in the game than I am. So I'd love to know: What do you and your partner do to ensure a happy relationship? 

MONDAY MUSING -- catching up

These days (or dark early mornings), I am a product of mismanaged caffeine and too much on my mind. Up since 3:25 am, having great fun checking out my revamped website and getting a little silly with the tagging feature for my blog. 

And then in the darkness, little Pip snuggled in beside me, I did something I haven't done in a long time--I wrote in my journal for two blissful hours. So much going on, so many things to say, so much to catch up on now that my frenetic working pace (the writing of my second novel) is slowing.

There is the good... so many exciting things happening for CHOSEN as we near paperback release date, like the Sutter Home Wine Book Club contest (please take a second to vote), selling the Brazilian rights and most recently, the nod from Target, selecting CHOSEN as an Emerging Author pick. I get so tickled about the idea of riding up the escalator in my local store and seeing my novel in the endcap... In fact, I will probably go spend some money there today to show them my gratitude (and pick up birthday gifts for the upcoming kid parties.) It is a huge testament to Maya Ziv (paperback) Sally Kim (hard cover) and Maria Massie (agent) that this book is getting good legs the second time around and I look so forward to talking about it again at upcoming book clubs and events. Stay tuned for information about stops on CHOSEN's blog tour this November/December as well as radio interviews and new reviews.

Remember all my worries about education this year, how after a year of homeschool, book tour and travel, we finally chose traditional school for all three kids? Good news: Hayden is thriving, Max is hanging in there and making me proud, and Pip is blossoming. And I am getting boatloads of writing work and even some running in those twelve hours a week when they are all there. Though J and I still toss around thoughts of next year, of more travel, alternative education, this is working for now.

Then there is the tough... two recent deaths--a father who leaves behind twins the same age as Hayden to cancer, and the loss of the lovely Brazilian man who baptized our children and charmed us at gourmet group dinners with his sparkling eyes and irreverent wit. The anniversary of the loss of dear Matty G looms large. An upcoming surgery for Hayden and Max's tricky transitions to academic life (see above, on the making me proud.) 

And there is the hopeful... a second novel, a love story, off to my agent last week. With that, a chance to return to other writing, to blogging, to reading, to revising and editing with friends. There is also a baby, a new niece, due in a matter of weeks. And of course, Sampson, who continues to challenge and charm us all. You'll be hearing more from me on all of these fronts soon... 

Please let me know if you would like to take a turn on the WRITERS ON WEDNESDAY series, or the DOG BLOG or if your book club would like to chat about CHOSEN. 

Writers on Wednesday -- literary agent Christina Shideler

1. Hooray! After a whirlwind of writing and getting my latest proposal ready to launch, finishing up the kids' homeschool portfolios for the state evaluator and adding Sampson to our family, I can return to my regular blog postings. I haven't forgotten about Monday Musing--I have been tossing one around in my head about how caffeine is to those of us approaching forty, what beer was in our twenties, and of course I have bene compiling photos and musings for my weekly dog blog. As far as Favorites on Friday, right now my favorite thing is Mrs. Meyer's geranium scented all purpose cleaner--I'm housebreaking a rather clueless puppy.

   But what's really exciting is to return to the Writers on Wednesday series. This week Christina Shideler, a literary agent with LMQ who has been representing me for three years, agreed to answer a few questions from the other side of the industry, a peek inside agency doors. I have enjoyed getting to know her this year and appreciate her keen editorial skills and finding out more about what makes her tick. She calls it soapboxing--I call it passion, and it's refreshing to see someone caring so much about what they do. Enjoy!

   1. What was the first book you ever loved?

There were two books I was obsessed with as a child, and both in distinctly different ways. The Secret Garden was absoluely the book that most sparked my imagination as a child. I would walk through the lightly wooded area near my grandmother's house and endlessly hope and imagine that I would stumble upon a beautiful hidden world like that. It immersed me completely.

There was also a book that I adored as an objet. It's called Marguerite Go Wash Your Feet illustrated by Wallace Tripp. It's a fun little book full of old limericks, poems and one liners with fantastic illustrations. The wit of it all really captured me as a child. I could really get lost in all of the intricacies of his drawings. It's the one book from my childhood that I still have.

2) Here it is--the question you're probably sick of: What do you see as the future of the hands-on, paper and ink book in the new world of e-readers? 

Well, it's an important question, and one we are on the cusp of figuring out. Of course I, like any literary nerd, desperately want to dig my heels into the sand and hold onto a tangible book until it crumbles into dust but it's just not possible! I think trends are telling us that, at least in the short term, more commercial works will be read largely as e-books, while more literary works will continue to be consumed in book form. Those that love aesthetics enough to obsess about literary fiction are not going to let that attention to art fall when it comes to the package containing the work.

Still, I think it's probably inevitable that eventually most works will be digital, but I do think that's further off than some doomsdayers would have you believe. And, I think we're likely to see a “slow readers” movement (think slow food, etc.) who champion books as beautiful objects. McSweeney's has done this with great success, and I've been heartedned by the success of something like Anne Carson's Nox, which is this beautifully packaged book art work. So it'll be interesting to see one trend pushing for books to become more artful even as the majority become just words on a screen. Still, there are certainly exciting things about e-books, of course! I think Electric Literature is doing a really great job of getting viral attention for top notch fiction in making their one sentence animation videos, and while I fear enchanced e-books because I feel like reading should be a solitary, reflective activity, it can be used effectively to enrich the work by providing context. So we'll see! I'm optimistic, though, that the art of the physical book won't die, it will just be somewhat marginalized and exaggerated.

3) What has been the most surprising thing you have learned while working in a literary agency?

How much of a good faith industry publishing is! I think some writers (understandably, given the heaps of rejection they face) think of agents and publishing as a bunch of grumpy, arms-crossed critics who are arrogantly trying to keep people out of their literary theme park. But, no! The most surprising thing to me was how desperately we all want to fall in love with new work. Believe me, we read query letters and manuscripts hoping to connect with your work and dying to love it. There are a lot of heavy sighs around the office when something just doesn't quite come together for us. We have to be tough, because there's so much work out there, and it's impossible to sell something and support it through publication and beyond unless you love it. But we want so desperately to love it and are trying every day to find something amazing.

4) What is your best advice for a new writer trying to get his query noticed?

A few things! Most importantly, I'd say do your research and try and target your query appropriately. Check the acknowledgments of a few books you love and see the agent's name. Referencing other work the agent has done and ensuring that it's up their alley wins you a lot of points. It shows you're serious.

The other big, more nebulous thing, is to communicate what your work is really about. I was just talking to an intern of mine the other day about how a lot of writers at the querying phase aren't good at articulating the deeper themes their work addresses. It's such a huge draw when an author is able to summarize the plot expertly and then give a sentence or two about what's at the heart of the novel. Is it, at its heart, a story about isolation in the digital age? Is it the anti-Americna dream story? Is it about what generations of secrets can do to a family? Remember, you've got to sell this book over and over again—from the querying stage, to editors, and finally to readers. Spend the time thinking and writing carefully about what it's really about before querying agents!

5) What author would you most like to have lunch with? Why?

Oh dear, probably Miranda July because she does everything and I feel like she reached into my brain with her short story collection and put it through some machine that turns brains into words. She is fabulous.

6. Top 5 books of all time?

This is tough!

No One Belongs Here More Than You- Miranda July (see above about brain to paper machine)

Love is a Dog From Hell (poems) by Charles Bukwoski (he may have been a terrible mysogynist but he was the king of one liners)

Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides

Bluets by Maggie Nelson (a recent addition and amazing!)

The Sound and the Fury by William Faulkner

7) What's on your nightstand now?

So, so many things! I just finished Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro, which was excellent. I've been in the middle of The Means of Reproduction by Michelle Goldberg for a while (feminism!) and am at last reading George Bush, Dark Prince of Love by Lydia Millet. To read: The End by Salvatore Scibona, Ship Fever by Andrea Barrett and many, many others!

8. What great question didn't I ask that I should have?

How do you feel about the state of women writers?

I really hope and think that we're at a turning point for women writers in this country. As a young feminist and a lover of women writers, it is incredibly frustrating to me that an industry that is majority women continues with the same male-centric biases from generations past. There has been a lot of deserved hub bub this year about the lack of recognition of some really excellent women writers, including VIDA's excellent report on the percentage of women's contributions to top literary magazines. And I am often disheartened at how publishers attempt to push women writers into commercial women's fiction territory, often trivializing a lot of the strength of their prose. We, as an industry, definitely need to move to elevate more women writers and package their books in a way appropriate to their content.

It's a particular mission of mine to find and get published “quirky” women writers; those whose voice falls welll outside of the expectations of a woman writer. Writers like Lynne Tillman, Yiyun Li and Lydia Millet who write female characters that are not classically sympathetic, and certainly are not the intuitive, emotive martyrs women characters one so often finds in fiction. And I think we're on the cusp of this. My meetings with young editors certainly leads me to believe that a new generation is fed up with the male-centric aesthetic that's led writing in this country for so long and we're eager to change it.

* *** * 

Bio:  Christina Shideler was born and raised in Texas, and no she does not have an accent.  After a stint living in France and drinking away a portion of her 20s in Austin, she moved to New York to finally do something she loves. Having started her career at Europa Editions, she now works at Lippincott Massie McQuilkin with her lovely colleagues and dog/mascot Mammoth, who is the luckiest dog in New York.  She is a vintage clothing fanatic, low-level connoisseur of scotches and sparkling wine, and a deep lover of science, though fiction has always had her heart.

WRITERS on WEDNESDAY--Grant Schnarr

I am so thrilled to be sharing Grant Schnarr's heartfelt and wondrous new novel, The Guardian Angel Diary, with readers this week. I was fortunate to get a sneak peek and chance to review this several months ago and I was immediately taken with Nicole's story and the honesty of her voice. I was up all night reading, and re-reading, and had to call Grant while frying up my kids' breakfast bacon the next morning to talk about it. This story is part inspiration, part revelation, part wake up call; all heart. My review runs just below Dr. Mehmet Oz's endorsement that we should all be talking to our guardian angels.

Dr. Oz and his wife have celebrated this novel and will be hosting their own interview with Grant on their Sirius radio show:

Dr. Oz Show

Friday, June 3rd

Noon to 1:00 PM EST
Sirius 204 and XM 111.

This week, Grant was kind enough to answer my questions below. Read on and enjoy!

1. I am always fascinated by the story behind the story--how did The Guardian Angel Diary come to life?

The Guardian Angel Diary (TGAD) started out as an idea to create a forum for providing an opportunity for me to share the knowledge and, uhem, wisdom I have accumulated over the years with people about the basic questions of life – Why am I here?  What kind of deity created me?  What happens when I die?  What’s the purpose of life?  Big questions.  I’ve seen so many books where the author had used a story of someone running into a mysterious sage, or a Native American elder, or visited a different culture, as a forum for just that.  So, in the beginning, that’s all I was looking for.  The idea of a sixteen-year-old girl talking with her guardian angel came out of nowhere.  Or, maybe the idea came from my guardian angel.  But once the idea came, well, everything started to happen!

The first shot at the book was pure dialogue between Nicole and her angel, and it was good, but the story hadn’t developed.  I hadn’t really tried to do that yet.  I knew she developed a brain tumor, and she needed to resolve everything she could about her life before the big operation, but the sub plots had not been created at all.  After the initial work with dialogue I sat down and meditated on the plot.  It all pretty much came to me right away when I gave myself a chance to listen inside, and be inspired.  Many of the stories are true, meaning they are based on true accounts, mostly of my life, and also of some others whom I have life-coached over the years, as well as pure fiction.  I studied and interviewed cancer survivors, and also relied on several teens who had shared with me their struggles with growing up during our life-coach sessions – all with permission.

It took three and a half years to write the novel, and finish the story, and literally, the ending was tweaked the day it went to press!  In fact, the original ending of the book was very different from how it ends now, and I am glad it took so long to finish the book, because it gave me time to actually see how the book should end, and every time I think about it I get excited – it’s so much fun!  

2. I was completely taken with how well you captured the voice of Nicole. It reminded me of Blake Nelson's "GIRL", where the reader is completely, believably transported into the narrative of a teenage girl. Was there anything specific that you read or listened to before writing to help you find that consistent voice? 

Having worked in the men’s movement and written the Art of Spiritual Warfare, based on the military general and sage, Sun Tzu, people do ask, “Where the heck did you get that girl voice of Nicole in TGAD?”  In some ways, it surprises me, that Nicole became so real, but I can trace some of it back to a few origins.  First, I grew up with four sisters.  Need I say more?  Also, having spent much of my career working and appreciating teens as a counselor, pastor, life-coach, and teacher, it came pretty naturally.  But this book was written differently than all my others.  I had to get out of town and be all alone to write this, and this was my biggest hurdle in writing the book.  I couldn’t write it an hour here or an hour there between job and family life.  I had to be alone for long periods of time, mostly renting or borrowing friends’ cabins in the mountains of PA, where I could sit with Nicole and her angel, and really allow them to come alive in my heart and mind, so that the writing would flow, and the characters could take on a life of their own.  It was a spiritual experience to do it that way, learning so much about life, as I explored it deeply through their conversation, and Nicole’s challenges and growth.  I cried a lot in those mountains.  I really did.  Most of the times when Nicole says, “Crying…”, no, every time Nicole took time out to cry, I was taking time out to cry.  And that’s how real this story is, because much of what she remembers really happened, to someone, to me, to someone I love, and she represents all of us, readers included.

One more word about that.  The voice of Nicole, though a very rugged teen, and owning something of a foul mouth (you should have seen the original manuscript which the editors made me tone down!), her voice was also the voice of a very innocent child, and that child talking to her angel, to God, was my child inside, and I think everyone has that child, and identifies with the child inside Nicole.  But this is the only book I have written that I can go back to again and again and never get tired of reading, because the final product is not me.  Nicole is her own beautiful, innocent, rugged, determined, loving self.  I love Nicole.  I really do.  I know readers will too.

3. TGAD is not your first book--how does it differ from what you have written before?

This is my first novel.  It’s also really from the heart and not written for any other reason except to share my heart and soul with others.  I don’t represent any church, denomination, belief system in this book but my own, and it feels real to me.  Other books of mine are teaching pieces, non-fiction self-help, or explanations of the philosophy of Recovery Program or the teachings of Emanuel Swedenborg, or presenting broad thought on the noble warrior from all cultures.  This book is pure heart and soul, and depth.  It’s not that all I’ve learned in the past isn’t in this book.  It is, but it’s freely given with no agenda except to share the experience of life and its value, and help people connect with all that is and be happy.  

4.  Give us a little history on how you came to writing--did you always know there were stories inside you? Which authors were your inspiration?

When I was in Fourth Grade I began my writing career with a humorous composition about my dad taking me to church, and everything going wrong.  The teacher actually called my parents in and kind of asked, “What’s wrong with that boy?”  I had no idea why there was so much fuss, but apparently even my first writing stirred up a lot of buzz.  In seventh grade I wrote a story about a boy who was called by a dark angel to go with him to heaven.  Again, dark.  But the teacher took me aside and told me it was promising, and actually asked me if I ever considered being a writer.  I did, after that.  He was instrumental in putting that idea in me.  

The really funny story though, and ironic, is that in my local church someone offered a $10,000 prize for anyone who wrote the first self-help book from a Swedenborgian perspective.  That stuck with me in High School and College, and when I got out I wrote that book, Unlocking Your Spiritual Potential, based on the twelve steps of AA, and Swedenborg’s teachings, which are very similar.  The man who offered the prize knew I wrote the book, and it was even published by a Catholic organization, Abbey Press, and did quite well, but he never acknowledged my achievement and I didn’t get the prize.  I really didn’t care at that point because my career had been launched and I was off and writing from the pure love of it, and that was fine with me.  A year after the man passed away, we were at a church convention, and his wife announced that the prize was finally going to be given to someone who had written a self-help book, and I was very excited.  Well, they gave it to a friend of mine, Ray Silverman, who had written the same sort of book as me on the Ten Commandments, very ecumenical, good book.  But I was, as Nicole would say, “Pissed.”  I never did find out why that happened, but family members confided in me that the man just didn’t think I had done it the way he wanted, and his wife had such a love for this other book that she went ahead and gave the prize to Ray.  Today Ray and I joke about it.  He’s still publishing, but I have him beat out by about five books, and I love rubbing it in his face that karma is on my side on this one.  It’s all in fun.  But you know, it’s all good, and perhaps not winning that prize spurred me on to write more on my own.  Six books later, and published in almost a dozen different countries, I’m proud of myself not giving up back then, and striving to write for the right reasons, like helping people, rather than for prizes anyway.  But that tantalizing offer did get me started.

As for influential authors, I like Shakespeare, Swedenborg, Lao Tsu, T.S. Elliot, John C. Maxwell, Thich Nhat Hanh, J.K. Rowling, Mealody Beatty, Dan Millman, Robert Bly, Robert Moore, John Lee, Stieg Larsson, Elizabeth Gilbert, Alice Sebold, Tony Jones.  Some of these are inspirational and some were more like, hey, if they can do it, so can I.

5. There is some theology woven into this novel, some truths that you are sharing, and the story is published by a religious press. Did you struggle with the balance of doctrine and plot?

TGAD is published by the Swedenborg Foundation, who published five out of seven of my books.  I’m grateful to have a good relationship with them, and there is certainly a solid Swedenborgian theme in the book, about a loving God, angels, and the reality of the afterlife.  But it’s funny.  I wrote the book, as said before, with the idea in mind that this wasn’t a sales job for any church or denomination, and it did not represent any theology except my own.  I submitted it to several publishers, and I was surprised the Swedenborg Foundation was interested.  When considering signing the contract with them, and going through a re-read myself seeing if this book was a good fit, I was surprised to see just how much it still did resonate with my religious roots.  Here I thought I was being a rebel!  But if you pay attention, some things are said in this book that resonate with a much more universal approach.  This book is for everyone, and I say a few things in here about the nature of God and revelation that I’m surprised some theologian-colleagues of mine haven’t jumped out of their chairs after reading it.  I suppose they probably haven’t read the book yet since it just came out!  Oh no.  If they read this interview, they’ll be sure to look into it!

I didn’t struggle with the balance between the lessons that are definitely in the book, and the plot, but it was a process.  I really wanted the wisdom of Nicole and her guardian angel to stand on their own, and remain with people.  That’s probably the most important thing, but the plot became so strong it really took over, and I think the balance is good.  In fact, I’m surprised that people who have read the book seem to be taken with the plot, and I really hope they also walk away with the message too.  

6. Tell us a funny story from the trenches of a writer's life... like the time I showed up to a reading and the only person there was a woman sleeping in the back who was mad at me for waking her up. Anything special come to mind?

The funniest and most difficult time was doing a book signing in Toronto.  Actually, the Toronto Star did a full page on my book, Art of Spiritual Warfare, which made the trip more than worth my while, but the book signing was a disaster!  I usually do a fairly emotional storytelling routine.  The people there were like zombies.  They didn’t smile, didn’t laugh, and didn’t move.  One woman’s phone went off during my talk and she just let it ring and ring right in front of me.  I just wanted to get off the stage and go home.  Finally I just stopped and said, “Am I in Toronto?  Or did I land in Quebec?  Because I’m beginning to think that I’m speaking English to a bunch of French speaking people who don’t understand a word I’m saying!”  They laughed at that!  Then it ended.  No one had any questions.  No one bought a book.  I still shiver when I think of that night!

7. Criticism comes with the game--how do you handle it? 

I’ve been a public figure for over a quarter of a century.  It comes with the territory.  Yes, it bothers me when people criticize, but I’ve gotten to a point where I can fairly easily brush it off as part of the business.  If it fits, learn from it.  If not, don’t even give it the time of day.  I’ve come to a point in my life where I just don’t have the time or energy to put up with critics.  Nine out of ten times the criticism reflects more on the critic than the criticized, and like I said, if there is something that I need to learn from it, I grab it, but then move on.  Love what you do and never look back.

8. What's on your iPod/reader/nightstand right now? 

I’m reading Love Wins by Rob Bell, Abandon by Meg Cabot, and a bunch of Swedenborg in connection with my teaching at Bryn Athyn College.  I always have the Bible on my night table, and I often read spiritual and self-help books, and only one or two good novels a year, like Chosen!

You probably weren’t asking about music but it’s a big part of my life.  My iPod has a lot of hard rock on it, like my band, “No Reserve!” on it, and the most awesome blues singer and player - Joe Bonamassa, also Led Zep, Soraia, A7X, Jimi H., Buckethead, Tool, U2, Stones, Rage Against the Machine, Pink Floyd, Jeff Beck, Bowie, Bon Jovi, and I even have to admit – Metallica.  I also like new age music, Deva Premal, and am getting into some lighter stuff like Mumford and Sons.  

10. I don't want to give too much of the story away, but I was especially touched by the sibling relationship between Nicole and her brother. It rang true and was full of the love and affected ambivalence of teenage siblings--can you talk a little about your inspiration for this?

No, I can’t.  Because it is real, and it’s personal.  I’m glad you caught that.

12. This book has an obvious audience in young adult readers, but I also imagine there are many of us who will find the idea of someone watching over us very compelling and reassuring. Do you think this story has particular resonance right now? 

In light of trends, angels are the new vampires.  This book is riding the wave of a huge trend not only with teens and young adults, but also in growing interest in the afterlife.  A lot of new books are here or coming on the market with an afterlife flavor, Meg Cabot in Abandon, Heaven is For Real, Rob Bell’s Love Wins is about the afterlife, The Summer We Came to Life, a new release by Deborah Cloyed.  It’s a hot market, and I must say, I wrote the book for everyone, not just young adults.  Everyone can benefit from this book, getting connected to their own personal reason for being, comfort and hope for what might await them, and also get in touch with the depth of love and courage which Nicole so bravely manifests.

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About the Author:

Grant Schnarr is a teacher, certified life coach, and pastor of the Creekside Church in Huntingdon Valley, Pennsylvania, and teacher at Bryn Athyn College. He is the author of several books on spiritual growth and recovery including The Art of Spiritual Warfare, published by Quest Books, which has been published in several languages on four continents. His other books include You Can Believe, Return to the Promised Land, Spiritual Recovery, and Way of Wisdom, co-edited with Eric Buss.