Monday Musing--It's Just a Number, Right?

A few days ago, I hopped on the scale to get the base reading for a puppy weight check. What? What's that?The scale must have been on a grout line or something, but no... there it was. It wasn't horrible, but it was a number I haven't seen since I was on my way up or down from having a baby*. And while that would be a welcome surprise, I'm pretty sure that's not the case, as a decision we made in early 2008 would make that somewhat of a medical miracle. 

I should be clear here--I'm not popping any buttons, we're talking maybe three (five) pounds, but when I reflect back, I realize that putting on my favorite Lucky jeans has been making me feel more breathless than fortunate recently. 

So what's the story? I read author Nichole Bernier's clever interview about what gives when wearing the hats of writer and mother, about how it is difficult to keep more than three balls in the air at once. This year, I added the new ball of having my kids home all the time to my juggling routine, so there was WRITING/BOOK TOUR, HOUSE, KIDS/HOMESCHOOL. Like Nichole, I watched exercise fall out of rotation more and more. (And if you ask my husband, he might point to a few other items that have been more backburnered this year. Yes, I'm talking about the ironing.)

The kicker is, I do exercise; I still run, but it's the same 3-6 mile routes I have since I was eighteen. In the winter season, I play ice hockey, and there's co-ed field hockey once a week March-November. But I don't go to the gym. I haven't since 2007, when I had my kids on a delayed vaccine schedule and we renamed the day care room at LA Fitness "the germ" for everything they brought home from there. The most serious 'workout' I do is the Gilad fitness show on cable--not rigorous and so ridiculous to squat and curl in my living room where swinging a weight too wildly could brain one of the kids bopping and sweating alongside me. 

While I went through the usual teenage weight angst, rib-counting and dieting dramas, as an adult I have been lucky. Pregnancies were kind to me and breastfeeding melted the pounds right off again. I eat pretty much what I want, play the sports I like, and I look pretty much the way I want to. (Though of course who is ever really satisfied?) Part of this is because a lot of the things I like are relatively healthy--roasted kale, quinoa, grilled tilapia and grape tomatoes with a little shredded cheese stick is one of my all time favorite meals. Our family doesn't eat much meat and we've been gluten free since 2005. As a result, we don't eat out often. My biggest vices are bacon and dairy--I could go the rest of my life without ever having another bagel, but removing cheese from my diet is unthinkable. And then there is the sugar in my tea, a must. And white wine... 

So how to handle these unwanted extras on the scale? Do I tell myself it's just a number, and focus on the more important things? Could it be that I'm crossing over into that new phase of life where, post-35, a woman has to work harder, literally run to stand still?  Or maybe I need to do the hospitable thing and invite these three (five) random pounds to stay? After all, they got up in the dark with me on those early writing mornings and kept me company while I drank sugared jasmine tea and wrote about a fictional marriage falling apart. These three (five) pounds traveled all over the country with me on book tour, eating nachos everywhere from the deep South to the Pacific Northwest. (It's a disorder--if there are nachos on the menu, even in a Chinese restaurant, I am literally unable to order anything else. Ask J about the crab shack in Outer Banks.) I'd like to be a gracious host, but I don't think the pounds can stay. Summer is here and trust me when I say with my short legs, 'mom-style' tank suits do me no favors; I've got to be able to sport a two piece. The extras must be cut.

My first line of attack has been to add a little more intensity to my runs--to pick a route with the hill I mention in this essay more frequently and try, despite the summer humidity that makes it feel more like swimming, to go more often. 

Secondarily, I have examined my diet and I've come up with a few likely culprits:

1.) Nutella--I buy this in the jumbo size jar and Pippi and I have 'tella toast 'n' tea almost every morning. People we stayed with on book tour could not believe the amount of Nutella we can go through in a week. This is not negotiable. Do you see this face?

Morning Ritual

Would you leave this face hanging when it came time for our morning ritual?

2.) Summer mojitos-- every summer, the mint patch under our cherry tree goes wild, and J and I are forced to harvest it, to keep it in check with nightly mojitos during our evening walk. These are his amazing concoction of muddled fresh lime and mint, ginger ale, Bacardi and sugar on the rim. Swoon. There are so many reasons I love this man.

Which leaves us with this:

3.) Grilled vegetables-- this is the only other thing I can think of. It's summer, and we're grilling more, which means asparagus and sweet potatoes and peppers and onions drizzled in olive oil outside on the grill. Olive oil is fattening, right?

So the cut that needs to be made is obvious. It seems a shame, with summer's bounty and all, but I sure am going to miss those veggies. 

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*This is not entirely true. Other than pregnancy, there was one other time when I weighed more than 125. It was at the end of my freshman year of college. Seventeen years old, at The University of the South, away from home for the first time, I discovered beer. Thursday nights, my roommate and I would buy Falstaff by the $10/case (it's no wonder I still don't like beer with that as my intro!) and there was no amount of D3 field hockey or dining hall salad bar (albeit with liqui-lard ranch dressing) that could combat guzzling those before heading out the ATO house to drink more of it while standing on our heads. A complete cliche, I gained the dreaded freshman fifteen. 

Writers on Wednesday -- Maya Ziv

Today I have the distinct pleasure of bringing someone from the writing world, an editor at HarperCollins who worked very closely with me to bring CHOSEN to life, the lovely and talented Maya Ziv. Maya graciously answered many questions, some submitted by readers, some I just dreamed up, to share with you the life of an editor and some inside scoop from the ever-changing world of publishing. Welcome! 

1) What was the first book you ever loved?

I feel like I never know how to answer this question! I can say that as a young girl, I was absolutely obsessed with the Cinderella story. I had versions from all around the world and watched the Disney adaptation—and any other adaptation I could get my hands on!—about a million times. I also had a tape deck (so dated now!) on which I played the Disney soundtrack so many times my father almost broke the tape on purpose. It was this fervent obsession that made my aunt, also a book editor, comment that I was a born English major.

2) What originally drew you to the publishing world?

 Not to be corny, I was just born a reader. I was one of those kids that ate books, and unfortunately, was not very strong in other areas (read: math and science). When I was nine, we had “Take Your Daughter to Work Day”, and I couldn’t go with my mother, who’s a therapist, so I went to work with my aunt, the book editor. I walked into Simon & Schuster, saw the rows of books, and fell in love. I think what also helped was that for lunch we went to the 21 Club and I ate french fries. I think it was the french fries that really sealed the deal. I still have a note that I wrote that day stating my intention to be an editor when I “grew up.”

3) What is the publishing accomplishment of which you are most proud?

That’s a good question, one that I’m not sure I can answer. I guess a touching moment that stands out to me, was the first time I gave a debut author an early copy of his finished book. It was the first book I had worked on and so, in many ways, I think I over-identified with it. We both teared up looking at it, and it hit me that we had created something tangible that was indeed out there in the world. 

4) Readers ask me all the time if it hurts the author when they buy my book for their Kindle or other e-reader. I've always figured a sale is a sale is a sale, and at least it's probably harder to loan someone a book that you bought electronically. What's the inside scoop?

My personal opinion is that sales are sales, and while e-books are undoubtably here and making an impact on the market, I don’t think it’s a negative thing at all. Change is scary (I’ve always hated it!), but in this case I think it’s exciting.

 5) As part of a major NYC publishing house, what do you make of conversations like this about prominent writers abandoning their publisher and going out on their own? What about for the everyman? 

I’m embarassed to admit that sometimes I’m so caught up with emails and manuscripts that I don’t actually follow some publishing stories enough to form an opinion, so I feel a bit uninformed to make an intelligent answer. Re: the argument that there may not be a need for publishing houses, I always direct people to Laura Miller’s excellent piece on Salon. As someone who has been up to my elbows in slush, I think it makes a great point! 

6) Another stock question, but one I know some of my readers will want to hear the answer to: what is your best advice for a new writer trying to get his/her manuscript published?

 My best advice is to revise your manuscript until you would want to send it out yourself. And then read comparative titles, see what’s working in the market. And lastly, build a platform: Network with other authors, try to get pieces or stories published, gain a following on a blog, Facebook, or Twitter. I think the best thing an author can do is be informed and engaged in the process.

7) I know you're a runner--what do you listen to while you run? 

I actually don’t listen to anything! It’s me time—thinking through things, composing emails in my head, going over a mental to-do list. It’s my only real destresser.  

8) What book do you most wish you had been part of? 

 I’ve never been asked that, what a great question! I know I should be adventurous and name a book that involves time travel or exotic places, but the truth is, I’ve always longed to live in a Jane Austen novel. I want to take walks with Elizabeth Bennett and be friends with Emma. I know those women comparatively had very dull lives, but I’m a sucker for the clothes and for the period language. 

9) What author would you most like to have lunch with? Why?

 Well, when I was in elementary school I won a tea with Judy Blume, which is pretty much the highlight of my childhood. As an adult…I think Laurie Colwin. I just love her books and aesthetic so much, that I envision her making us a delicious homecooked meal while she gives me sage advice. Does that make me sound completely selfish?

10) Which book would you most like to see adapted to film?

Tricky question! Too many that I just can’t think of. I’ll stick to the classics and say that as much as I LOVED the Anne of Green Gables movies, there could be room for a new adaptation. 

11) In the movie version of Chosen, who would you cast as the main characters? 

After seeing Water for Elephants I am completely confused about casting direction. For now, I can definitively say Rachel McAdams as Chloe. (Chandra, do you want to kill me?) CKH: No, I can see it. I was thinking Claire Danes, because she does such a good job of being an ugly crier and wearing her anguish on her face, but maybe she's getting too old to be Chloe? 

12) Top 5 books of all time?

Disclaimer: This question changes everytime someone asks me, so this is the answer as of today:

Cowboys Are My Weakness by Pam Houston

The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay by Michael Chabon

Happy All the Time by Laurie Colwin

The Known World by Edward P. Jones

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

Diverse enough for you?

13) What's on your nightstand now?

Ha—what isn’t?! Bossypants; As Always, Julia; The Saints Will Find Their Way; Persuasion

14) What great question didn't I ask that I should have?

Q: What book has motivated you to do something new? I have to say that Julie Powell’s Julie and Julia motivated me to start cooking more, while Gretchen Rubin’s The Happiness Project helped me implement small changes that made day-to-day life seem more manageable. 

 * *** *

BIO: Maya Ziv grew up in New York City, and after a stint in the Midwest for college, returned to New York to work in book publishing. An avid reader and runner with sadly no other real hobbies, she lives in Brooklyn, NY. 

You can find/follow her on Twitter: @Maya784

a good day

I've been living in three worlds these days--an uncomfortable feeling. 

There's the real one, where I'm a mom shepherding my kids through the transition to summer (we brought forty-two books home from the library yesterday!) and their chores and their fun, and I'm a wife, a gardener, and when I can grab it, a reluctant runner.

Then there's the CHOSEN life, preparing for the promotion and release of this novel. Meetings with my publicists in New York, articles and essays swirling around, jotted down. 

Then there's my current writing life, my new novel, where I've been in the most painful part of the homestretch for the past few weeks. Wanting to wrap it up and get it to my agent by deadline, worrying that it's not done, not right, not quite good enough. I worry that I have made characters too real, too flawed to be followed. Ironic, since the working title is FOLLOWING. 

Plus I tried to do the caveman diet for a week. Dumb. Cheese helps me write, I swear.

Last night, my brother suggested we try this running route that I have been dreading, six and a half miles that ends with a brutal quarter mile uphill. He's an English teacher, a good writer, and though he keeps a better pace, he's kind enough to slow it down for me, my favorite running companion.

He let me talk, the whole time, about my book. About the ending. Huffing and puffing along, I wheezed about my ideas and worries, twists and reveals, Easter eggs and closure. (Thanks, B!) We tweaked, and debated, compared to other works.  Sucking wind up the final hill, I suddenly had it. The ending!

I came home and took the kids swimming, jotting down watery notes while I timed them holding their breaths, cheered their underwater summersaults. I wrote until my eyeballs were dry at midnight. I sat down this morning and dashed the rest off, a sprint to the finish. And I finished it. 

In my CHOSEN life, I learned that NY Times' Lisa Belkin wants to run my essay on Why I Choose Homeschooling--a favorite, heartfelt piece of mine. (I'll post link when it comes available.) Thanks, Jocelyn! 

And in my real life, my boys weeded the shade garden without argument, my daughter beamed when I picked her up from music class, and I found four Calvin and Hobbes books my son doesn't have to take with us to his all day annual craniofacial team appointment at CHOP on Thursday. 

A good day--off to the pool.